“When I was sick, I could barely get out of bed, let alone put myself out there to potential partners.”
Libby connects her virginity to her personality traits (“cynical, private, loud, opinionated and chubby – though my friends would say I’m being too hard on myself”) and her 10-year struggle with depression and anxiety. It could be due to a childhood of abuse, or physical health issues like cerebral palsy, or a religious upbringing, or even lack of comprehensive sex education.” “It could be tied to mental health issues, ranging from low self-esteem and social anxiety to serious depression. Yet there are many reasons that a thirty or fortysomething might never have had sex, says Libby, a 37-year-old Canadian. And the most recent data available, from 2010-12, suggests that just 2.2% of British men and 1.1% of women were virgins at the age of 30. Cath Mercer, a principal investigator on the Natsal survey of sexual attitudes and lifestyles in Britain, says the vast majority (95%) of the general population report have made their “sexual debut” – as she rather grandly puts it – by age 25.
It may be that later-in-life virginity is dismissed as a problem with an easy fix.
